losing it

Losing It

This shortness of breath, it’s not my first
Pain wells in my chest, my heartbeat races
I don’t know if I can bite back the tears this time

One too many times is not quite right
It’s more than every day’s infinite struggle
It’s the silencing of the voices inside
That causes me to tremble and shake, I feel it coming on
Another panic attack, a wave of depression
Anxiety eating my heart out and
The pain devouring what’s left of it

I’m losing it, make it all stop and go away
I cant stop thinking about my steady stream of failures
Every time I see you I think and hope
But you crash it all on my head, pain rains down all around
You reign in my heart yet you don’t want to
You just throw it all away and me with it
All I want is love, will I never find anyone for me?...